one_youlove

two hundred & eightyfour

2009-10-30T00:39:00.002+08:00

itunes: meet me halfway by black eyed peas

From the fact that I barely come here for an entry, it goes to show how time-tight I've been for the past ten weeks.

And I'm trying to fight back my tears again. For quite a few times today, I really wanted to breakdown. The stress is building up, and I'm just afraid things won't turn out well.

Consolation, my parents are going to buy back supper. I'm super-duper hungry, but I guess I'm prepared to stay up tonight.

Just one more month to go.

two hundred & eightythree

2009-10-06T00:39:00.002+08:00

itunes: battlefield by jordin sparks

I got a feeling that I'll be falling sick quite soon, have been sneezing alot the past two days. Not that I'm trying to curse myself or anything, but part of me feel like I want to just be ill for a day so that I can rest at home? I'm getting a little tired already.

And I know I tend to cry, to relieve stress. RRRAH I NEED TO RANT.

two hundred & eightytwo

2009-10-05T02:19:00.003+08:00

itunes: the good kind by the wreckers

I'm getting a migraine, and whenever it comes, it's highly 'cause I'm stressed.

And I'm feeling a little scared and apprehensive. I don't want it to be a wrong choice for me. Just that if I get pushed too much for this, I think I would rather want to give it up. 'Cause it doesn't stand that high a priority on my list.

But then, yet again, I know myself well enough. I might just be too chicken to admit to that and then eventually will stay in there if I get pushed.

I still have to learn how to reject.

Please, let it be okay.

two hundred & eightyone

2009-10-04T01:07:00.002+08:00

itunes: learning to breathe by switchfoot

I finally have the time to sit down for a really proper entry, I hope.

Actually, I think it's just me that keep procrastinating. I seem to come here recently, just to vent my anger and frustration.

Mid-term break starts for one week, and I finally felt like it's time to rest. For the past seven weeks, I've been keeping myself busy with trying my best to keep up with school work and class. This was hardly what I've done for the past year, except maybe last sem's exception for TWC. But somehow, at the end of the day, I tend to feel a sense of accomplishment to know that I know what's going on in class. No more getting lost like how I felt in FA previously, and hopefully this continues for the rest of the semester.

Just another seven more weeks plus after recess week. I'm looking ultra forward to December holidays in LA finally! =) HAPPY ME.

Only thing is that, I forsee lots of rushing for projects plus presentations. And ah, I think I should stop with school stuff.

But then, this is what it's been keeping me busy. The thoughts of having a SAthree gathering, going back to Dempsey slowly drifted to the back of my head. And I guess all these will have to wait till semester ends.

Ooh, and I forgot to mention this (though it happened almost 2 months ago): I caught my first ever meteor shower!!! =)

two hundred & eighty

2009-09-16T01:33:00.002+08:00

itunes: breakeven by the script

I can't believe myself. Just the two questions, and I'm giving up. I actually break down, again.

I guess I'm starting to feel the stress that's beginning to build up. I didn't think it will be this bad. I didn't even think it was going to be bad at all.

ARGH, I'm going to sleep it off.

two hundred & seventynine

2009-09-15T23:01:00.002+08:00

itunes: permanent by david cook

This is effing demoralising. I'm attempting the nth time of this question, but effing solver refuses to bulge. And I can't believe I'm crying over this.

%^$&%*)(*&^@#$%^&*(_{P*&^%$%#

twohundred & seventyeight

2009-09-09T02:05:00.002+08:00

itunes: before the worst by the script

Somehow, I feel quite crap today.

I'm tired already, last week was when I begin to just doze off at earlier timing. And this week, I'm mentally tired. I don't know whether it's school work.

And if it is, omg I want to kill myself over MS. It's freaking tedious.

And I have to face it when I wake up from my sleep in 8 hours.

two hundred & seventyseven

2009-08-24T20:15:00.002+08:00

itunes: broken strings by james morrison & nelly furtado

I thought last night would have changed things, but seems like it's worse.

Every dinner just makes me want to finish my food as fast as I can so that I can hide back in my room again. It's not supposed to be this way. It feels as if it's best if I stay away as much as I can. Out of the house is becoming my comfort zone instead.

What's happening?

the truth hurts, and lies worse.

two hundred & seventysix

2009-08-19T21:47:00.003+08:00

itunes: heartless by kris allen

Eff. I should just try to stay in school as much and as long as I can. I don't really see the point of coming home to have dinner anymore if dinner always end up this way.

And I can't stand the sight of blood. It makes me nauseous.

two hundred & seventyfive

2009-08-18T01:03:00.002+08:00

itunes: kristy, are you doing okay by the offspring

I gotta tell myself to bear with it,
bear with it.

It's only the first day of school, and I feel tired already. Sometimes, I really am amazed by how I can handle the minimal hours of sleep that I get.

two hundred & seventyfour

2009-08-16T03:52:00.002+08:00

itunes: whatever it takes by lifehouse

And I just realised, it's 3.53am.

Slept quite alot the past few days, in Genting, somehow to recover the loss of the hours of sleep during the few days earlier at Bondue Run 2. Tonight's probably gonna be the last night that I'll be getting so many hours of sleep. Hello again to <6 hours of sleep everyday!

Genting was FUN! Not exactly the best substitute for the supposed-to-be 4 months in US, but it was worth it to end the Summer holidays that way.

1st: 8 hour long bus ride up the mountain, walking around first world, flying coaster, haunted house, getting bounced out of the casino, enjoying the perfect weather, 1rm/card daidee & blackjack
2nd: theme park, bumper car for six times in total, baskin robbins, movie - district 9, 100rm ahyat abalone dinner, camwhoring, 20bottles of heineken, circle of death & daidee, long sleep
3rd: baskin robbins, 8 hour bus ride home

I think I ate really alot the past few days, I can't believe myself. Rrrrah.

Time to sleep!

=)

two hundred & seventythree

2009-08-02T00:11:00.003+08:00

itunes: hate that i love you by rihanna ft. ne-yo

Maybe it's cause of the effect of getting ten hours of sleep in total for three days, that I broke down last night. I felt agitated and guilty for the tone of the words that were coming out of my mouth through the phone.

That aside, Bondue Camp Run 1 is over and it's left to the second run.

It's the 1st of August, or rather it was still about ten minutes ago.

The almost-four-months of Summer break is coming to an end. To think that if there wasn't any of the stupid swine nonsense, we would have been in LA right now.

But I guess I'm still thankful for it, for the fact that it's a blessing in disguise.

The days started off quite unproductively at first where I would spend hours infront of my laptop finishing five seasons of Grey's and more Friends. Then came the baking, fishing, luxor-ing, planning, bondue camp and the in-between meet-ups.

And somehow, I don't appear at Dempsey anymore. I'm being honest, that I no longer have the passion to go back there to scoop, for as long as I want to. In the future, maybe.

So anyway, 1st of August.
('Cause I know you'll read this!)

Happy Six months. ♥
And NO! I didn't forget okay! I was just waiting for the right time to say it! =)

two hundred & seventytwo

2009-07-07T23:24:00.001+08:00

what the eff.

every one day in a few weeks, i have to come home and get effed for reasons i do not know why.

adgksvhjzfdkjk;kaskfsldzsd

two hundred & seventyone

2009-06-29T02:49:00.001+08:00

Though I'm feeling kinda tired, I'm finding it hard to sleep. It's weird.

Worse still, I'm hungry. I'm so gonna wake up with gastric tmr.

Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld from M1.

two hundred & seventy

2009-06-17T01:04:00.002+08:00

itunes: bye bye by mariah carey

When something goes wrong, it tends to follow.

two hundred & sixtynine

2009-05-30T02:39:00.002+08:00

itunes: heartless by kris allen

Haha, blame myself for being bored. I backtracked my entries for the past two years, for the month of May. It's like that -

2007: =( / =)
2008: =)=)
2009: =)=)=)

Right. Haha.

Okay, back to scooping ice-cream tomorrow night, or rather tonight. Can't believe I finally got myself to schedule down for three shifts next week. Took me quite a long while!

And I really need to stop sleeping so much. I'm sleeping twice the number of hours of my regular sleeping hours, but it's not as if I sleep alot regularly so it should actually be a good thing. And I'm just blabbering.

I think I need new songs. I'm getting sick of my iTunes. Tell me, who actually reads this?

HAHA.

two hundred & sixtyeight

2009-05-22T02:21:00.001+08:00

It kinda sucks to have a bad day, especially when you haven't had one in quite a long time.

Only consolation: that the day has ended.

Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld from M1.

two hundred & sixtyseven

2009-05-19T00:58:00.001+08:00

So I'm looking through photos on iPhoto to prepare for a birthday present.

I remember how the class will always create lots of noise while waiting for PW lesson to start. It was during JC One actually. Since we had only twenty minutes break before PW, we'll go into the class early and play with the projector and off the lights to surprise whoever that was coming in. There were shadow puppets shows too. Haha.

Okay, gonna goodnight soon!
Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld from M1.

two hundred & sixtysix

2009-05-18T01:42:00.001+08:00

I was looking through some of the photos on FB, of the days in ACJC. I miss the times when we all would try to rush to LTs early so that we could get the seats as a whole class. And each time when some other random people from other class take our usual spot, we'll get pissed and bitch about them and tell ourselves that we'll come in earlier the next lecture to get the seats. Sounds childish but this is an example of the many memories that I miss of ACJC. I miss the class! And it's gonna feel good to see everyone again this Saturday, hopefully with a more complete turnout this time. =)

I think I'll note down what I can remember from the times in JC, at least one each day.
(Don't say that I'm bored; 'cause I already know I am.)

But then, it's not as if I'm not liking or enjoying my life now, 'cause I am =). And furthermore, after FOUR whole days, finally! <3

P.S. I'm having cheap thrills, but in case you noticed why there's no itunes at the start of entry, that's 'cause I'm using my Blackberry!!! Which explains:

Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld from M1.

two hundred & sixtyfive

2009-05-09T01:46:00.002+08:00

itunes: no surprise by daughtry

If this is going to continue for the next few months until school starts again, I foresee myself going crazy.

And no, I'm not kidding.

In a week,
- Gossip Girl
- One Tree Hill
- American Idol
- Friends
- Facebook
- Emails
- MSN
- Blogs
- iTunes
- iPhoto
- Going out :)
- Eat
- Sleep
- Sit
- Rot
...
- and decompose.

Yes, I think I'll decompose.

No surprise, indeed.

two hundred & sixtyfour

2009-05-04T00:22:00.002+08:00

itunes: candle (sick & tired) by the white tie affair

I've been home the whole day, but this time I'm getting quite sick of it. Plus the fact that I'm sunburnt, feeling like a lobster, it ain't helping. And all I'm depending on is re-watching Friends again. Sitting and lazing on my bed for practically the whole day, rrah. I want to go US! =(

And I'm returning back to work at Dempsey tomorrow, but I'm not exactly looking forward to it 'cause my back hurts alot.

I need to find something to do.

two hundred & sixtythree

2009-05-01T01:58:00.011+08:00

itunes: come back to me by david cook

And US is off, the trip that I was so looking forward to, for the whole semester, or rather almost the whole of my first year of uni. But well, I'm fine with it already, learned to come to terms with it. What other choices do I have anyway, besides blaming the stupid SWINES?

So my day was good anyway. =)

two hundred & sixtytwo

2009-04-15T21:31:00.001+08:00

itunes: nothing

EXAMS ARE OVER, and I'M COUNTING DOWN TO US.

It's in less than 3 weeks, I CAN'T WAIT!
=) x 100000

two hundred & sixtyone

2009-04-03T00:36:00.002+08:00

itunes: that's when i love you by aslyn

Sometimes, the words are just too hard to express the emotions.

It's amusing how sometimes I act in the way that I don't wish to, unknowingly.

It's a mistake if we just erase it
From our hearts and minds, and I know

two hundred & sixty

2009-03-25T11:33:00.003+08:00

itunes: blind by lifehouse

Somehow or rather, it seemed to mean, this time.

I'd be lying somehow, if I said it doesn't.

And I just realised I'm left with only six weeks, till I'm going to be away in US for three months. The semester felt as if it was starting really slow at first, and I remember hoping for it to speed up. Now, we're already at Week 12.

It kind of upsets me that I won't be able to work on Free Cone Day, which is gonna be on the 14th April, in the mid of exams! And once again, I've disappeared from Dempsey.

But all's good still. I'm happy anyway!

=)

two hundred & fiftynine

2009-03-16T00:31:00.009+08:00

itunes: i stay in love by mariah carey

♥

two hundred and fiftyeight

2009-02-28T00:38:00.003+08:00

itunes: that's when i love you by aslyn

When you have to look away
When you don't have much to say
That's when I love you
I love you, just that way
To hear you stumble when you speak
Or see you walk with two left feet
That's when I love you
I love you, endlessly
And when you're mad 'cause you lost a game
Forget I'm waiting in the rain
Baby I love you,
I love you anyway

Here's my promise made tonight
You can count "on" me for life
That's when i love you
When nothing you do can change my mind
The more I learn, the more I love
The more my heart can't get enough
That's when I love you,
When I love you no matter what

So when you turn to hide your eyes
Cause the movie made you cry
That's when I love you
I love you a little more each time
And when you can't quite match your clothes
Or when you laugh at your own jokes
That's when I love you
I love you, more than you'll know
And when you forget that we had a date
Or that look that you get when you show up late
Baby I love you, I love you anyway

Here's my promise made tonight
You can count "on" me for life
That's when I love you
When nothing you do can change my mind
The more I learn, the more I love
The more my heart can't get enough
That's when I love you,
When I love you no matter what

That's when I love you
When nothing baby
Nothing you do could change my mind
The more I learn, the more I love
The more my heart can't get enough
That's when I love you,
When I love you no matter what
No matter what

♥

two hundred and fiftyeight

2009-02-11T00:26:00.000+08:00

itunes: sober by p!nk

Here you go! =)

two hundred and fiftyseven

2009-02-01T10:48:00.002+08:00

itunes: nothing

Somehow or rather, from now on, I just want to push everything away, and put all those that happened then, far back into my memories.

I don't want to wish for this or hope for that again.

I'm happy like that. =)

two hundred and fiftysix

2009-01-17T01:37:00.003+08:00

itunes: white horse by taylor swift

Honestly speaking, I won't deny it. Especially after tonight.

But I know I shouldn't harp on that fact anymore. It was over and it still is. So just leave it as that.

I just want to move on. And get myself back once again.

After all, I had a really lovely day, fulfilling one.

baby i was naive,
got lost in your eyes
and never really had a chance
i had so many dreams about you and me
happy endings
now i know

i’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairy tale
i’m not the one you’ll sweep off her feet, lead her up the stairwell
this ain’t Hollywood, this is a small town,
i was a dreamer before you went and let me down
now it’s too late for you
and your white horse, to come around

two hundred and fiftyfive

2009-01-13T02:05:00.003+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

I thought, it wouldn't hurt as much as it used to. But apparently not.

For the first time this year, it hurts alot again, worst ever so far.

I'm just hoping for it to fade away as the year goes. If not, it's going to be unbearable, yet again. Time and time again, I'm brought back to such a situation.

Okay, I make it sound like there was alot of times, but no. Just thrice, two subjects, within five years.

One broke, mended it back, but broke it again. Then the next, warned of the danger, patched it back, but burnt badly.

I keep getting reprimanded for living in denial, but that's just me. What am I to do about it?

I'm glad for school, but unfortunately for the wrong reason, the workload burdens me so much that I'm too tired and can't be bothered to care about it. For just that period of time only.

I NEED A PERMANENT SOLUTION.

two hundred and fiftyfour

2009-01-13T02:02:00.000+08:00

itunes: 回到過去 by 周杰伦

eFFF you.

two hundred and fiftythree

2009-01-04T02:42:00.002+08:00

itunes: i won't disagree by kate voegele

People usually post entries that reflect on their 2008, or of how they would like 2009 to be, at the end of a year, or the beginning of a new one.

But I guess, I'll try not to.

Today's dinner with SAthree, was yet another good one. I like how we can get so many people to turn up for a meal, though not all and not everyone can come for every single one. But yet, somehow, we can all still talk to each other so comfortably. And that's what motivates me to plan for more of such.

I'm looking forward for school to start on Monday, somehow. And there's a strong determination in me, to get myself to work hard.

Yet at the same time, I still want to be able to help as much as I can at Dempsey. It's almost impossible for me to get my life at Dempsey back like how it was for those 7 months or so, the post-A's life where majority of it was spent at. But still, I've so much attachment, or rather affection to that place.

And I want to get this message across to someone who has been important in my life for the past seven years, and still is. I miss you, and those times. But somehow or rather, I'm beginning to feel tired to try anymore. It might not just be on my part to feel that way, probably you too. So much is changing, you, me, everything else. I can't be like how I was before. It's the start of a new year, and all I've heard from you, was asking for just a favour. I don't mind being left out from all those, all I mind is knowing that I still mean something.

Probably, I ain't doing a wise thing posting this here. I don't know what's going to happen or if anything is going to at all. But after all, I have this space for the longest time I ever had.

I need Friends therapy, and by that, I mean the tv show.

two hundred and fiftytwo

2008-12-29T03:48:00.002+08:00

itunes: what makes a man by westlife

Up till now, I still miss you.

And I still can't find the reason why.

two hundred and fiftyone

2008-12-11T21:13:00.002+08:00

itunes: it's only life by kate voegele

I know I can, I just need time.

Somehow or rather, I just can't wait to get to KL, which is in a week's time. Maybe I really need some time away from here, all that's been happening.

So what exactly has been happening then?

Post-exams have been spend most of the time working, just that I was at WCP majority. Gave me lots of time to think there, and really appreciate all the people who dropped by to just keep me company. That includes the few spontaneous decisions after work, supper and kbox. Then there was Chunkfest, which I felt, FCD was probably more fun then. I think the best part of the night, was probably the boogie-ride we got in Georgie, which served as a Scoopies' van that night, since almost ten of us stood inside!

And since I had so much time while at WCP, I'm done watching Meteor Garden, but MVP can't load on my mac. I managed to look through the Europe photos again, and I really just want to go back there, have fun in the snow, buy more stuff from Stamford Bridge, snap more photos, and come back to enjoy the fun I had back in Dempsey then. It seems just so recent, but yet, it's been half a year.

Besides these, I finally found comfort in driving around myself. Today officially marks the day that I've had so much control over my own car, or any other car, ever since getting my license for half a year. I like the fact that I can go anywhere, and I have my ipod to keep my company.

Nothing beats listening to Daughtry while driving. And I have Vindicated to blast and vent the angst. When I feel like it, Jay Chou and Idol dramas soundtrack to bring me back to those days. Not forgetting, the familiar lyrics of Westlife and BSB that I know word-for-word.

Next week probably marks a busy week for me, scooping more ice-cream and meeting ups and Sentosa, then I'll be in KL on Saturday all the way for Christmas till the 28th. Honestly, when I come back, I hope I can make a few more days in Dempsey before school starts. 'Cause who knows, maybe the 5 mods-timetable next year might prevent me again.

two hundred and fifty

2008-12-07T05:37:00.002+08:00

itunes: vindicated by dashboard confessional

Morning.

Well, today yet probably marks another chapter of life. The end of one and yet the beginning of another one, seems like it.

I need to, move on.

But can I?

two hundred and fortynine

2008-12-02T14:59:00.002+08:00

itunes: inconsolable by backstreet boys

It's been quite some time, hasn't it?

I'm expecting myself to put in an entry tonight, finally, that's if the connection at home is no longer cranky.

In fact, I must.

I'm at WCP and it's just so so cold here now... Brrr.

two hundred and fortyeight

2008-11-09T15:37:00.001+08:00

itunes: what hurts the most by rascall flatts

Haley: Are you really in love with him or are you just in love with the idea of him?
Peyton: If I'm being honest, maybe a little bit of both. I think I miss what I thought we would be.
- One Tree Hill

ACAD WRITING, ACAD WRITING!!!

two hundred and fortyseven

2008-11-06T18:07:00.005+08:00

itunes: can i have this dance by zac efron & vanessa hudgens

I was just waiting for it to strike me, and yeah, I'm finally sick. So many late nights, ever since school started. 12, or rather 12+1(recess) weeks of school has finally torn me down, at the end. I was just quite surprised at how I could take so many nights with just that minimal hours of sleep, and sometimes not even any at all through the night.

I definitely need more rest, but there's still AW research paper bugging me. But I think I'm quite determined to complete it this weekend, at least before Monday.

It's yet another year again. I ain't hoping or want anything. In fact, somehow I feel this time, I want it to be more of a quiet one. I probably might end up trying to finish up my AW instead. The last year of having a 1 in front of my age.

Actually, I want to hurry finish up my AW, so I can start mugging proper. To think, there's only like about 2 weeks plus till the finals come, though it's only two papers. Somehow or rather, I have a feeling it's going to be quite hectic for me the next semester. But we shall see how it goes then.

Anyway, it's only like one more week of lessons left, and then the study week. One semester has passed by just so fast, I've been so busy with school, that there's going to be so much things to deal and settle with at the end of the exams. I just hope I won't procrastinate them anymore. 'Cause if I do, I don't know how I'm going to be able to recover what I would have lost by then.

Honestly, there's so much things that I have to say and do about it, but I just don't know why I can't. I keep pushing it further and further away.

I've been so, so tired, and I still am, that it's not even funny anymore.

two hundred and fortysix

2008-11-02T04:36:00.002+08:00

itunes: straightjacket feeling by the all-american rejects

Honestly, I had lots of fun at closing today, or rather just now. Somehow better than on Friday's. I don't know why though.

Haha, so I'm gonna take this break, and try to make full use of it. I just want to go back probably on Friday for a lil while, so I can try the new flavour!

And today = a HAPPY me, 'cause CHELSEA'S BACK ON TOP!

yesterday was hell,
but today i'm fine without you.

two hundred and fortyfive

2008-11-01T04:40:00.001+08:00

itunes: there and back again by daughtry

It felt like, one hell of yet another awkward, night.

two hundred and fortyfour

2008-10-12T02:18:00.003+08:00

itunes: in the sun by joseph arthur

Within the span of a few days, I've found out so much, I've known so much. As Jin said today, it's a shock, a big blow.

Yeah it def is. Who could have saw this coming?

Honestly, what I feel, that is the most wasted, it the fact that we three could have been hanging out like good friends, if probably things didn't start in the first place. I could actually see that coming back then. But unfortunately, it didn't, and I guess it can't anymore.

I'm going to learn to be the gracious one.

two hundred and fortythree

2008-10-10T03:50:00.002+08:00

itunes: blind by lifehouse

Tonight, I realised, that so many people around me do care.

I stepped into the shop, I knew for sure, that it was different already. And yet, I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

What happened?

I didn't want myself to feel this way. It was definitely the last thing that I wanted to happen. But there's nothing I can do to help or change it. I'm not even sure if it's even possible to.

It doesn't matter anymore.

From tonight, or rather just now, I'm going to stop dwelling in it. There's no point to anymore. And Uncle Sam promised me he will, so I hope he's able to bring me along.

Back to school soon, and I'm going to "do what I want and what I like, and live for the moment"

Right, haha.

two hundred and fortytwo

2008-10-06T04:21:00.002+08:00

itunes: new american classic by taking back sunday

Best night so far, and it's been quite a lil while.

So painting the small portion of the wall today, for CSP. No doubt we ain't any of the artistic sort, it turned out fine, or rather good, and happy!

The most spontaneous and last-minute decision, to go for dinner/supper and the shop for our logistics!

Celebrating a birthday at the car lobby of a condominium, in the middle of a common walkway. Who could have thought of a better place? Then virgin trip to ChompChomp, and jokes about parallel parking. Next stop to my first at Mustafa, shopping way past midnight! Car-ride back home, freaking out about the cockroach in the car.

I call this, WTS.
And in case you didn't know, it's "Welcome to SMU".

two hundred and fortyone

2008-10-05T01:02:00.002+08:00

itunes: we used to by daughtry

Stab,

again.

two hundred and forty

2008-10-04T03:24:00.003+08:00

itunes: romantic balcony by mltr

You know, I think I just can't seem to bear to.

I can't forsee how it's going to be like if I'm going to start hating.

It's like, I'm looking at the photos, and I just can only smile about it. For those moment, now I feel, it was too good to be true.

Maybe I like living in self-denial. Somehow or rather, I just can't get myself to believe that it's like that. That what is obvious now is what I never thought it would be.

A total different perspective today, I'm determined. But yet, I give in easily.

I don't regret. I never believe in regretting. Because you wouldn't know or learn, till you've tried. It's just, wasted.

And right now, I just want to give in again.

two hundred and thirtynine

2008-10-03T01:02:00.002+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

effing Stab it again, will you?

Yeah, the ♥.

two hundred and thirtyeight

2008-10-02T22:27:00.001+08:00

itunes: romantic balcony by mltr

I honestly think,

I'M GOING CRAZY FROM STATS101!

I would rather be taking the A Level Math Paper 2 again, twice of the Stats paper, than this.

I have no idea, if i should use approximation for the questions tmr, should I use continuity correction, should I use the GC, no clue about uniform distribution.

Why can't it be as straightforward? Or is it just me?

I think I really need sleep.

two hundred and thirtyseven

2008-10-02T03:53:00.002+08:00

itunes: romantic balcony by mltr

I'm just scared that there will come a day when I'll begin to hate you.

'Cause I can actually see it coming.

I don't want it to come to such a point. But I'm just afraid, what if?

"Missing someone gets easier every day because even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will."
- Peyton Sawyer [Hilarie Burton] from One Tree Hill

two hundred and thirtysix

2008-10-02T01:32:00.003+08:00

itunes: romantic balcony by michael learns to rock

I found the song, just. But probably, it's a lil too late already.

I actually miss the car rides back home that I had for those few times, alot. The journey distance was quite long, from "one country" to "another country" as we claimed. But the time was too fast, probably.

Then, I thought of the nights at Dempsey, after closing. The music blasting really loud, and that one night or two, where we had spare time to have some sort of singing session on our small little stage. Daughtry, and more Daughtry.

Great memories.

Then also, the Monday openings. People talk about Monday blues, but I looked forward to it. And of course, how can I forget the Fridays?

I'm actually going to try to sleep early, hopefully.

high above this world,
missing your love.

two hundred and thirtyfive

2008-09-30T04:16:00.002+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

I had fun, enough to make me not think about it for that short lil while.

But tonight, made me realise that I've missed , alot.

And unfortunately, I still do.

In fact, I think it's much more than I ever did before.

And you know, I'm fixed on waiting still. It's stubborn, when the facts are shown to me, right in my face.

But I can't help it.

That's just how it is.

Goodnight world.

two hundred and thirtyfour

2008-09-28T05:29:00.002+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

I just have to admit,

I miss you, alot.

And I wish I could tell you.

To look forward to (motivation):
LIFEHOUSE.

two hundred and thirtythree

2008-09-26T01:55:00.003+08:00

itunes: i promise by stacie orrico

Somehow, I couldn't control it last night. I broke down, once again.

In fact, it probably was the worst, but now it's all okay. I realised it's grown deeper than I had previously. Maybe I'm right, maybe I'm wrong. I guess, I'll probably never now.

Since it's all over.

This aside, I'm so getting used to school now, twelve hours almost everyday, what's new? At least I don't come back home and complain. Rather, I enjoy it. Some deadlines off the load, and now the mid-term tests. I think I'll probably need to think through carefully how far I want to go, and what I'm going to do for the next few years. I'm actually still feeling undecided.

And now, I think I'm feeling very, very tired.

two hundred and thirtytwo

2008-09-22T02:45:00.002+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

How apt. Note: I didn't purposely click next for many times just to get it shuffled to this on itunes!

I heard the thunder at first, then saw the lightning flash, and now the heavy rain drops. It just reminded me of that one late night, or rather really early morning after one of the Euro Cup 2008 matches.

At least now, I still have Ugly. :)

Haha, oh well, I think I need some sleep. I really don't want to think too much.

two hundred and thirtyone

2008-09-21T19:09:00.001+08:00

itunes: NOTHING

Myeh, I just realised, I suddenly miss the times that I spent in Switzerland, Paris and London, alot and alot. The two weeks of holidays in June, was like HOW FUN!

(I was just getting a break from ACAD WRITING - which is killing me, and so I surfed through the FB photos.)

BIG match tonight, CAN'T WAIT!

two hundred and thirty

2008-09-17T03:49:00.002+08:00

itunes: makedamnsure by taking back sunday

One thing, I gotta learn, is to start knowing who and what and when to trust.

'Cause if I don't wake up, I probably might still be living in that innocent and naive world of mine.

Sometimes, you just think that that one person, is the correct one to tell things to. But the next moment, it seems otherwise to you. And you wonder, if you've made the wrong move.

So, did I?

Well, I'm just glad that the nights that I've stayed till late in school for the past weeks or so, have been making my life in Uni much more fulfilling.

To think, I actually will have difficulty in bringing myself away from that place gradually. I didn't think it will have felt so easy. I refuse to admit to the fact that it's caused by that reason.

Never mind, doesn't matter. Whatever it is, I'll just appreciate whatever there is right now.

two hundred and twentynine

2008-09-14T02:50:00.004+08:00

itunes: hate that i love you by rihanna ft. ne-yo

Well, so after today, it kind of confirms it.

I feel, actually, that I'm gradually distancing from that place. It seems like it isn't as bad as what I thought it was going to feel like. Why is that so? Probably the reason why I was so attached to the place from the beginning, wasn't the right reason to feel so. And now that it's gone, it's starting to fade too. It's all changing. Kind of sad, ain't it?

It just doesn't feel right, anymore.

So while I was on the way home from Dempsey, I watched the videos of Daughtry Live at the Traffic Jam Street Party about a month plus ago. I'm just really glad that I got to watch the band live, and it was a really fun experience. Probably nothing live will be as good as it was.

And tonight, is the ninth night consecutively, that I'm sleeping after 3am.

I'm so glad that Chelsea's still leading. Downside that Terry got sent out though.

Right now, I'm actually losing my voice.

two hundred and twentyeight

2008-09-11T03:09:00.002+08:00

itunes: 回到過去 by 周杰伦

I think I'm crazy, this is the sixth night that I'm sleeping after 3am. Something's wrong with me that I barely feel tired in the day.

No doubt school has been getting busy, really busy in fact. I've got a three days-school week timetable, and given the fact that it's only week four, I've been in school everyday for the past two weeks at least.

But it's all okay, I'm appreciating it. I'm beginning to enjoy school, and the relief I get each time when assignment/project deadlines are met. The week is coming to an end, and I can't believe it, it's already a month into school.

Tomorrow, I'll hope that I can sleep before 3am at least. And, I just can't wait till SAthree gathers at my place on Sat!

two hundred and twentyseven

2008-09-08T03:22:00.004+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

I never thought that I ever needed to, nor I ever would. But let tonight, be the first, and the last time.

That I will cry.
'cause of you.
Thanks for the memories.

Here's yet another closure.
:)

what about now
what about today
what if you're making me, all that i was meant to be
what if our love
never went away
what if it's lost behind, words we could never find
baby before it's too late
what about now?

two hundred and twentysix

2008-09-05T01:38:00.000+08:00

itunes: i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie

Probably, it's just fading.

accept it

two hundred and twentyfive

2008-09-04T01:50:00.001+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

Only consolation:

Lucas and Peyton are back together, for the First episode of Season Six.
At least.

two hundred and twentyfour

2008-09-04T00:03:00.002+08:00

itunes: i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie

Well, seems like I can't. At least, not for tonight. I don't know why. I tell myself that I can, but it seems otherwise. Each time, the more I think about not giving in, it seems like I'm falling in deeper?

It kind of felt as if I've got a lil crack there, yeah, the heart?

Things change, my dear.

Even though I try hard not to, I think I'll always believe what Peyton said in One Tree Hill, people always leave.

I know it's cliche, and everyone uses it.

It's just part and parcel of life, I should have expected it. (Jin, rmb, you told me to be prepared?)
Well, I doubt I'm still ready for it yet.

Never mind, I guess I still can manage a little smile.

two hundred and twentythree

2008-09-03T22:46:00.002+08:00

itunes: hands down by dashboard confessional

I admit, I've been having a negative attitude towards school, for the past two weeks. But somehow, this week, I'm beginning to be more receptive towards school. The 'hate' that I had for the past few weeks, is subsiding, and I guess it's a good thing? Probably 'cause I'm getting used to it, and knowing the fact that it's something that I can't avoid anyway. I've promised myself to get started on work, right this very moment, (after I'm done with this entry and prob OTH), and to make the best out of my next four years. I doubt I want to be really active in the school activities though. That's probably okay.

And after working last night, I don't know why, the feeling's sort of fading away? Wouldn't actually dare to say it's fading, but it's changing. I'm probably starting to miss less of it already. To me, this is what I probably was afraid. That it will change. And it seems like it is. I can't decide whether it's good or not. The past eight months sped passed so fast, that I kind of regret not enjoying it more. But it's all good. Especially the last three months.

I'm accepting it. Maybe it probably might work better this way. Just that I thought at first that it might have been something different? Seems otherwise, given the state. But it's all okay.

SO right now, I'll just be prepared for a really busy weekend, plus busy-busy weeks to come. And whenever I can, I'll go back to stand behind those dipcases. =)

two hundred and twentytwo

2008-08-29T01:11:00.002+08:00

itunes: we used to by daughtry

I don't know what it is, or rather how to describe it. But there's something inside, that's eating me up. It's like ARGH!!!

I think, probably I do need to learn, to start letting things go. At the same time, to accept how it is, and try to make the best out of what is left. Because it seems that I'm trying too hard right now, and it's not good.

So far, school has been okay, just that I don't like school yet. I'm still in the mood of 'take me back to my scooping days'. Yes, I'd rather work than go to school. People think I'm crazy for thinking that. Unfortunately, I can't help it, that's they way I'm still feeling right now.

In fact, you know I really don't like this month, like August. The first week was still a-okay, but things just felt as if it was going downhill ever since the second week. I really don't know why! Only consolation, is that August is ending, and I'm hoping to start September anew. If possible, be like how July was?

Now, I'm just feeling really, really tired. So I'm gonna go grab a bite, probably try to do a lil more reading for lesson in the morning later, and then catch my sleep.

two hundred and twentyone

2008-08-17T18:28:00.000+08:00

itunes: memory by sugarcult

fuck.

two hundred and twenty

2008-08-17T04:00:00.002+08:00

itunes: memory by sugarcult

This is probably one of few times, that I've felt like that this year. I admit, the thoughts that are going through in my head right now, came up much more often in the past few years. But through this past eight months, it had been all good, except for tonight, right now.

Difference is, it's all towards a different subject.

I actually didn't expect myself to have feel this way so fast? In fact, I'd probably never think that I was gonna be like that at all, until recently, when I realised that things were all going too well, and that it slowly began to change.

Watching an episode of Friends didn't manage to make me laugh at all.

Maybe it's just time, for me to sleep.

two hundred and nineteen

2008-08-10T19:23:00.002+08:00

itunes: whatever it takes by lifehouse

To sum up for the past two weeks, here's what I've done.

1. WATCHED DAUGHTRY LIVE
2. Bondue Camp 2008
3. watched more FRIENDS
4. went for NDP 2008
5. met up with more people
6. treasure more of the times that I stand behind those dipcases.

Yes, with point 6, I meant that each time I went to work, I kept telling myself that I'll be scooping ice-cream less and less. And I'm =(. I'm so so, SO going to miss that place. And this coming week, will probably be the last time that I'll be working more than once or twice a week, until maybe the hols arrived.

Anyway, I'm satisfied with my class timetable for the coming term. I've got a three-days school week, and managed to bid for the course successfully. Just that, sometimes, I get the feeling that my timetable is too good to be true? But, we'll see how it goes then.

Bondue was fun. I liked my group! We had our own kind of fun, especially the H2H talk on the first night, and our really sober-high mood on the second night. We probably didn't put in as much effort as the other groups, for the games and all, but we enjoyed each others' company and that was more than enough. It was quite a relaxing camp I would say, maybe that's why I'm not exactly looking forward to FTB.

You know, I've been thinking about how much I'd rather use those three days to scoop more ice-cream rather than go for FTB? Shhh, it ain't that good a thing. Let's see how it's gonna be then.

Anyway, this is going to be the last week of my almost 9-months Post A's vacation. It sped past really fast. To think that one year ago, we were all mugging like mad in the Hub/void deck/Holland V's Coffeebean/BPP's Starbucks. And the dinner from the parents' support group.
Honestly, honestly speaking, I guess I wouldn't mind going through that mugging period again, knowing that I'll be able to have as much fun as I had, for the last nine months.

Whatever it is, I just want to say, I'm probably having the time of my life, right now.

two hundred and eighteen

2008-07-25T02:51:00.003+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

It's a really simple video, but puts across quite a strong message I would say. But, I'm kind of a lil disappointed that this is the music video for this song?

Eh Jin, here's what the info you wanted which I got it off from Wiki: The song is a ballad, that was written by Ben Moody, David Hodges (both former members of Evanescence), and Joshua Hartzler, who is married to Amy Lee, the lead singer of Evanescence. It is one of only two songs on the album not at least co-written by Chris Daughtry.
(kind of a lil sad eh?)

Haha, never mind, I really, really can't wait to see them LIVE this Sunday.
=)

two hundred and seventeen

2008-07-23T01:23:00.003+08:00

itunes: take me away (acoustic) by lifehouse

It's been quite a lil while, hasn't it?

Well, in fact, today feels kind of like the first time that I'm a lil down, as compared to how I've been the past few weeks.

I guess. It's kind of like disappointment, no? The feeling that you get, probably when you think too much, yeah probably so.

I also don't know why.

two hundred and sixteen

2008-07-18T23:56:00.002+08:00

itunes: only one by lifehouse

Call it a sense of achievement. I'VE FINALLY CLEARED THE MESS IN MY ROOM.

It's been lots and lots of procrastination. And I'm sort of quite proud of myself. No doubt, the past few Fridays I've been out having fun, and thinking that I was gonna be bored at home today, it proved otherwise. Soooo, that's my Friday, for this week.

Now, I'm going to get my shower, sit down in front of the teevee and enjoy Friends, with my Trolli Gummi Bears, haha. =)

two hundred and fifteen

2008-07-11T00:47:00.001+08:00

itunes: always be my baby by david cook

Let's just say, life couldn't have been much better, than it has for the past few weeks, and now?

And I'm currently feeling hungry.

two hundred and forteen

2008-06-29T23:11:00.003+08:00

itunes: maybe by jay sean

Four years down, who knew that we'll be where we are today?

Instead of being all upset and emo about this day, I'd decided last night, while messaging bff, that I won't want to feel like how I did for the past two years or so, on this same day. I'd rather smile about it.

I had a chance right? Or rather, the same chance twice. Ain't it much better than the people who have been given just that, ONE chance. Am I to be considered lucky? Haha.

Uncle Eddy mentioned on Thursday night, that most girls won't fully understand and be able to control their emotions properly, till they turn twenty-one. Probably so? But since, I'm kind of still a lil far from that age, I shall just excuse myself from all these ups and downs. Can't blame it, haha.

And just to add on, I had a really fun weekend, leading up to this day. Friday was quite a eventful day! Narnia + Kung Fu Panda with made me really happy. Plus, ending the night at En Grill with the few constants for the past few years, (you all mean alot to me!). And my first ride in Wonder's car, let's say I'm so thankful for our conversation in the car. Maybe soon, we'll start to have more night rides okay bff!

Saturday at the beloved Demspey B&J's is always fun, esp. when it's closing! Plus plus, it was Sam+Pam+Ivan, what more could I ask for. And not forgetting, my dearest buddy Jin(there you go, your name again!) and finally getting to meet your gf too, Jin!

I haven't had such meaningful weekend for quite a while, actually. Anyway, I think it's high time to meet people, SC + SAthree!

Anyway, the Euro Cup final is tonight, or rather early morning later. It's ending, and yeah, ironically, that was what got it all started, just that it was four years ago.

Four-ty8
1461.

two hundred and thirteen

2008-06-27T00:50:00.003+08:00

itunes: what about now (idol gives back performance) by daughtry

Myeh, I've never used this term before. But, whatever.

I'm just like, feeling almost speechless about it? Towards how I feel. It's just sort of like a whole cloud of emotions. Making me all confused again.

I don't know if I'm to wait, or should I wait. And end up waiting for nothing, again? False hopes? Living in denial? Move on? Make a move? Doubt the feelings? Mutual? Be happy?

I have no idea.

I know though, I'm jealous. Quite sure of it.

And def, I'll miss .

But in what way? Which way do I want? What am I wishing for, hoping for?

Wait, wait, wait...

or not?

two hundred and twelve

2008-06-21T01:49:00.003+08:00

itunes: better in time by leona lewis

And this is for your sake, Jin.

Today again, honestly, I felt as if Dempsey's really my second home. The feeling of knowing every single person in the shop, nothing beats that. Was really glad to see Sam, and the usual faces, though I've already been back for one week and have been there almost everyday.

I don't know how often I'm going to be able to be back there, when school starts. All I know, is that I'll definitely miss the place, especially the people. Aww.

And I really think the song is apt.

Sounds weird, haha.

Sorry Wonder, I've should realised it sooner.

two hundred & eleven

2008-06-19T00:44:00.002+08:00

itunes: if i never see you again by maroon 5 ft. rihanna

I was bored, and thought this was fun.

Open iTunes. Go to your library. Answer, no matter how embarrassing it is.
Sort by Song -
First Song: Above Me - Rufio (And I've never listened to this song before)
Last Song: 7月7日晴 - 許慧欣 (blame my mando-pop craze back then, 5 years ago)

Sort by Time -
Shortest Song: Interlude II - The Fray (It's from the Live at the Electric Bootleg Factory album)
Longest Song: Pump It - The Black Eyed Peas (I have no idea why it's such a long version)

Sort by Artist -
First Artist: A*Teens
Last Artist: 98 Degrees

Sort by Album -
First Album: The A List - A1
Last Album: 98 Degrees and Rising [UK] - 98 Degrees

Search the Keyword -
Song title only - and see how many songs appear:
"Sex": 2
"Death": 1
"Love": 93
"You": (ah 365 songs were listed, but some had 'you' not in the title, and I'm too lazy to count)
"Me": (same reason)
"Drug": 0
"Hate": 6

Shuffle your library and list the first five songs. No padding your
playlist you hipster, you. Be honest!!

1. Nails For Breakfast, Tacks For Snacks - Panic! At The Disco (one of their songs when they still had the '!')
2. This Is My Now - Jordin Sparks
3. You Are The Music In Me - High School Musical Cast
4. 一見鍾情 - 群星(雪天使) (Like what the hell, from one of the Taiwanese Idol Drama)
5. From The Start - Ryan Cabrera

Total music: 2041 songs (and I've got repeated and live tracks, inclusive)

Anyway, I like the live band thingy at Dempsey. Makes scooping ice-cream much more fun, but oh well. I'VE ONLY GOT A MONTH LEFT =(

two hundred & ten

2008-06-16T03:48:00.002+08:00

itunes: breathing by lifehouse

'Cause it's been too long, ~~far~~ too long.

'Cause I am hanging on every word you say,
and even if you don't wanna speak tonight,
that's alright, alright with me.
'Cause I want nothing more than to,
sit outside heaven's door and listen to you breathing.
Is where I want to be.

I'll update in a while.

two hundred & nine

2008-06-01T04:16:00.002+08:00

itunes: one more try by a1

And I'm so glad, that I went down that morning in the end. At least now, I can fly off and shop in peace. =)

I've been sleeping around this time actually, for the past few days. Resulting in, a really restless me. My days of sitting in front of the teevee watching Friends and snacking is back. But I'm fine with it. Plus the fact that I'm actually leaving in a few hours' time. So, I know probably today might be the last time I'm doing that. After I'm back in two weeks' time, I'd probably be busy with the matriculation and camp stuff. And it's only going to be a few weeks more for me and my Ben & Jerry's. Soon, it'll be back to school, at a new campus, one that I've been wanting for, for a really long time.

I'm kind of actually feeling sleepy now, given that I'm almost just done with the packing. Alright, so I should just hope that I'll get internet access at wherever I'm going to be, for the next two weeks.

Enjoy the GSS in the sunny/not-so-sunny Singapore then, people!

Please give me one more try for the sake of our love
Give me one more chance 'cause I can't give you up
I can't live one more day without you in my arms
I could never find another like you

Probably the only song by a1 that I really love, by the way.

two hundred & eight

2008-05-30T02:43:00.002+08:00

itunes: over you by daughtry

Ah, no doubt I'm happy that I got my driving license already, it's been quite freaky that for the past two days, some vans have been not really nice in giving way and tried to change lane and cut infront of me when I was about to change lane too. Resulting, almost in a collision.

But well, there was the mention of me having a chance to get a car of my own, so =).

And work today, was okay, entertaining ourselves with my new Poloraid. But then, JIN!!! Why do you have to go to pastry?!?!?! I'll so miss someone flicking my cap, and teasing me, and doing whatever you like doing.

Honestly, I'm really going to miss our night-talks, playing our favaourite DAUGHTRY. Plus, the fact that I won't be around for the next two weeks, I so know that you're going to miss me like shit. And, I think, vice-versa too, haha.

Well, and time for some serious stuff, it's getting quite frustrating that I've not gotten any reply about my university application from ***. So much so, I'm going down later in the morning and asking them instead. I'm just worried it wouldn't be in time.

And, I realised I really shouldn't read too many blogs. That's 'cause whenever I do, I'm bound to find out something that would make me not exactly happy. Just a lil while ago, I came to realisation that I probably have been thinking too much and reading too much into the actions. It seems as if I'd been giving myself, probably false hopes, I could safely say. I'm hoping honestly, that what I thought, or felt at first was true. Because, I really don't want to waste another chance. It was taken away once from me, and again second time, by the same. Plus, I recently could feel as if it's healing, given the conversation just now.

But, but... it's kind of just like but.

I haven't been able to type much of these for quite a while.

two hundred & seven

2008-05-29T01:36:00.002+08:00

itunes: i'm all about you by aaron carter

And, guess what?

I CAN FINALLY DRIVE, LIKE, I'VE GOT A CERTIFIED LICENSE!!!

It's like, really, finally!

=)

And I had a great dinner, catching up with the SC girls.

I'll probably get my butt down to packing the luggage, now.

two hundred & six

2008-05-24T01:11:00.002+08:00

itunes: as long as you love me by backstreet boys

"to all those lost souls who have forgotten to believe in the immensity of love..."

I kind of love that line, quite alot, and in case you're wondering where it's from, One Tree Hill. Probably that's one of the reason why I love the show so much, the great lines, and the great great songs. Unfortunately, it was just the end of the fifth season. It's been five whole seasons and I'm still loving the show. I'm really looking forward to the sixth!

"hate is safer than love."

Probably so, I guess. During closing last night, I heard Daughtry's 'What About Now', and then it brought me back to that very day, when it was one of the worst day of my life. I could visualise myself in the Hub back in ACJC, facing the walls in a corner of my own, with the books and notes all on the table and I was drowning in my own sorrow/tears. But but, it was also this song, and that very day, that made me want to move on. It wasn't really successful back then, almost more than half a year ago, it seems. Anyway, I think I'm just ready to proclaim that I am, or at least I'm trying really hard to already, I AM! Haha, so yeah, Daughtry is ♥, and a big big part of my life. =)

Well, I've got a week more of work, then a two weeks' break to Europe, and probably, just a few more weeks of scooping ice-cream, sadly.

two hundred & five

2008-05-21T01:03:00.002+08:00

itunes: quit playing games (with my heart) by backstreet boys

So I'd decided that songs from the boyband-pop era, are more worthwhile to listen to. Nah, 'cause after hearing BSB during one of the closings last week, I realised I miss my Westlife-BSB-N*SYNC days.

And within one night, I uploaded A1, BBMak, BSB, Blue, Bardot, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Boyzone, O-Town, Spice Girls into itunes. Some even coming to almost ten years old.

Well, at least I've got a new playlist to listen to for the next few weeks.

Meanwhile, it's driving license + EUROPE =) to look forward to.

And Wonder, I hope you're feeling MUCH MUCH BETTER!

two hundred & four

2008-05-12T00:29:00.004+08:00

itunes: blind by lifehouse

(-) points
1. my fave AJnr slippers broke
2. john terry was out of the match at the fifteenth minute :(
3. CHELSEA LOST :( :( :( x 10000000
4. newcastle lost too

(+) points
1. great MOTHER's day + family day time
2. bought a pair of white slippers from topshop that i sort of like in replace of my broken slippers while shopping halfway
3. nice tauhuey to eat while watching first few mins of match
4. john terry is most likely fit for Champion League Finals
5. Chelsea still stands a chance in the Finals

Even though (+) > (-), I think I shall sleep early, like right after this, to cry about the (-).

And I think I'm just joking.

P.S: JIN! You know what to do when you see me on Tuesday!
(Since I'm like :( X 10000)
Goodnight :(

two hundred & three

2008-05-04T00:08:00.006+08:00

itunes: home by daughtry

I was just talking to Jin online earlier, and he asked me to update. So I explained that I didn't want to make this blog a routine thing for me, in the sense that I'll come here as and when I feel like it. And this explains it. Haha, so Jin, if you're reading this, which I'm sure you will, just don't flick my cap too much when you see me next.

Anyway, updates.

Scooping ice-cream has brought me much closer to a few people, especially for the past few weeks, and we all begin to see the political and competitive side, which unfortunately, includes almost all companies. Not that I didn't know about it, but well, I guess there's always the competitive nature in each human being. It's just how much of an extent it is. But this aside, all has been much much good. Like Free Cone Day! And I'm putting up photos for this, how rare is it?!

I had to do opening back at Dempsey and the crowd felt as if it was on a weekend night. People came in, thinking it was FCD and so many groups of students took the walk up the hill + cabbed up and ended up getting disappointed. Only consolation=> one whole barrel of free water for them to drink, haha. And I left to help out for an hour or so at Great World City's FCD which gave me a lil experience of it, and it was fun enough.

After-party back at Dempsey, was probably where it all hit me. I was really glad that I had my dearest Sam with me, and she sticked with me throughout the whole night. Even though I didn't exactly like what I saw when I first entered the doors of the shop, but heck it. Things felt akward, but it got better after a lil while, since all of us were spreading the DEMPSEY LOVE, haha.

Thank you Sam, Ari, Sann, Min, Tiff, Ivan, Jin, Uncle Sam, MamaJan, Bob, Alicia + GWC for that night.

After all, it was the 29th of April.

Moving on, SAthree finally had a gathering on first of May, and this time, we mangaged a bbq over at my place. Eighteen of us, the feeling was wonderful. Though the two main topic that night was ARMY+ UNIVERSITY, everyone ended up sitting around a table together, and just chatting the night away. How hard is it, for any class to get such a high attendance? But honestly, we always have almost the same group turning up and because of this people, I wouldn't mind making the effort to plan more of this. They're the backbone and joy of my past two years. =)

Anyway, I just realised a lil while back ago, that I've only got probably two more months to scoop the ice-cream, and it got me a little emotional, or rather sad. 'Cause working there, sort of open up my world to another side, and really really brightened up the start of my year, and still is. I really don't know how it's going to be like, when I do stop there.

Alright, I doubt I've typed such a long entry for a long time, and I think I need the sleep.

Goodnight.

two hundred & two

2008-04-15T21:45:00.003+08:00

itunes: better in time by leona lewis

Sometimes, I'd rather be more ignorant, and at the same time stronger, to tell people what I want, and when I'm not happy. I really wish I was much stronger, so people can hear me, out loud, and let me make my own decisions, do whatever I want to.

So, eff and listen.

two hundred & one

2008-04-15T00:14:00.002+08:00

itunes: better in time by leona lewis

I've been spending my life this way: driving lessons + scooping ice-cream & more ice-cream + watching o.c. + wasting time on facebook + shopping&eating with the mum + gym& run + random meet-ups.

Actually, that basically sums up the life I've been living for the past four months. Not that I'm groaning or complaining about it. It's good enough. I've got to know more and more people with each passing day, and I'm glad.

Just probably that I'm hoping to meet up more often with the people, like: sc people + sa3 + bowlers + others.

Anyway, there's like two more weeks to Free Cone Day, and I'm kind of still undecided between GWC or Cathay. Or rather, unsure of where I'm going to be assigned to, just hope I'll get to stick with the Dempsey people. And, a month and a half to go till Europe, I can't wait for Disneyland actually, haha.

Alright, one episode of O.C. before I turn in.

thought i couldn't live without you
it's gonna hurt when it heals too
it'll all get better in time
and even though i really love you
i'm gonna smile 'cause i deserve to
it'll all get better in time

It will.

two hundred

2008-04-06T02:30:00.003+08:00

itunes: stay for a lifetime by four letter lie

It's been a while, hasn't it?

Maroon 5 was all that great, fabulous I would say. Just that suffering from the post-Adam Levine wasn't that fun. But anyway, I'm just so glad that I caught them.

So being obssessed with the O.C. has kept me busy. And it kept me thinking again. I would just say, it's been quite a fast year, not all was too good, but fairly alright.

Much more changes this time, but I've realised I'm getting more used to changes. Or at least, I think I am.

I just feel, well, really, really tired already.

I'll just leave the rest to some other time.

Ain't that good a day, nor a time to put all down.

staring right back in the face
a memory can't be erased
i know, because i tried
start to feel the emptiness
and everything that i'm gonna miss
i know, that i can't hide
all this time is passing by
i think it's time to just move on

Goodnight.

hundred & ninetynine

2008-03-25T00:00:00.002+08:00

itunes: makes me wonder by maroon 5

TWENTY HOURS to MAROON 5's CONCERT, and counting.

I'm happy, because:
1. I'm almost done with U's applications.
2. I've got my driving test date and it's only two months away.
3. I watch two soccer matches straight without ~~almost~~ falling asleep.
4. Chelsea WON, WOOHOO!!!
5. Work today though really quiet, most quiet ever I would say, was fun still because Sam is always nice to me and Ivan kept laughing at me and KinMun(aka Chef Ivan) kept saying creme bole(brulee) and Jin lets me steal kachang.
6. MAROON 5 IS TOMORROW, LIKE TOMORROW!

Omg, Adam Levine, =)=)=)

finally.

hundred & ninetyeight

2008-03-11T01:47:00.002+08:00

itunes: inconsolable by backstreet boys

It's just one of those days, where you'd rather not care about anything, than to spend a few hours talking to someone and then bawling your eyes out. So much so, that the next day, someone comes up to you and ask why your eyes are swollen.

Yeah, I would choose the former.

And in case you're wondering, A's results were a-okay. I think so.

hundred & ninetyseven

2008-03-06T12:39:00.001+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

I gave up typing an entry after typing crap for a whole 5 minutes, so I just backspace-d everything. And I'll just leave this.

See you after Friday, then.

The sun is breaking in your eyes,
to start a new day.
This broken heart can still survive,
with a touch of your grace.
Shadows fade into the light,
I am by your side,
where Love will find you.

what if it's lost behind, words we could never find.

hundred & ninetysix

2008-03-04T00:54:00.003+08:00

itunes: kindly unspoken by kate voegele

'Cause there's always a limit to how much one can take.

This morning, I took 75 down to Dempsey instead, and the <5 minutes walk up the Dempsey Hill was quite heart-warming, plus I had the nice vocals of Kate Voegele on my ipod to accompany me. And you know you've been working too much, when the uncle who delivers ice to the shop every morning actually recognisese you from the back and stops his truck to offer you a lift up the hill to the shop. But anyway, I rejected and kind of signalled to him that I wanted to walk up instead. I actually, really enjoy the walk up alone, provided it's still in the morning, not under the scorching sun after-noon.

So finally, results are confirmed to be out this Friday, after 230 pm. It's finally here.

Plan for the rest of the week:
Tuesday: Scooping ice-cream, probably for the whole day
Wednesday: FTP
Thursday: FTP
Friday: SA3 Class lunch + results + prob dinner?
Saturday: SMU Open House + Scooping ice-cream
Sunday: Family

I'm actually quite pleased that I've got two days break from work, as much as I enjoy the scooping. Usually, I dread having nothing to do on the days I'm not working. But well, I'll probably go plan something to do for those two days, and look forward to it.

hundred & ninetyfive

2008-03-03T02:24:00.004+08:00

itunes: wish you were by kate voegele

So I spent a few hours at home today, reading up whatever information I could get from the three local universities online, and all the application procedure stuff. It got kind of dry after a while though.

And I'm finally done with all ten seasons of Friends, just that I'll probably be re-watching the whole ten seasons soon again, but in the correct order this time.

One Tree Hill has been great, keeping me in anticipation for the next episode, every single episode. And at the same time, allowed me to add songs into the iTunes. Check out Kate Voegele if you can, she's good and I've been putting her album on repeat the past few days.

Anyway, I really, really hope the results will be out by this week. It's taking too long, and getting a lil frustrating actually.

So for the next few weeks, it'll be scooping ice-cream + driving + preparing for ftt + uni stuff + meeting friends (as much as I'm able to).

I've seen your act,
and I know all the facts.
I'm still in love with who I wish you were.
It ain't hard to see,
who you are underneath.
I'm still in love with who I wish you were.
And I wish you were here.

Time to sleep.

hundred & ninetyfour

2008-02-28T02:31:00.004+08:00

itunes: what about now by daughtry

It kind of felt heart-warming, to hear this song after watching episode 9 of One Tree Hill.

And and, I really want the results out, or at least, I think I want it to.

shadows fill an empty heart
as love is fading
from all the things that we are
but are not saying
can we see beyond the scars
and make it to the dawn

change the colours of the sky
and open up to
the ways you made me feel alive
the ways i loved you
for all the things that never died
to make it through the night
love will find you

what about now
what about today
what if you're making me all that i was meant to be
what if our love never went away
what if it's lost behind words we could never find
baby before it's too late

what about now?

this broken heart can still survive,
with a touch of your grace.

hundred & ninetythree

2008-02-24T02:43:00.002+08:00

itunes: mesmerized by lifehouse

It's actually really hard, to get over something, or someone.

Takes time, seriously, and I think it's quite a long time.

Went for NTU's talk earlier in the day, and I'm kind of quite fixed on what I want to for the next three or four years. I'm just hoping really hard that I'll get into the course, at any of the three schools. Like I've been telling people, I'll go to wherever that offers me the course, rather than choose the place I want to go.

And actually, work tonight made me realise I enjoy the weekdays much much more, whether it's opening or closing.

Another week has passed, and I'm still counting.

hundred & ninetytwo

2008-02-22T23:39:00.002+08:00

itunes: first time by lifehouse

I'm kind of actually looking forward to the day, where I will not be the least affected by it.

But meanwhile, I'm just not able to yet, and it's something that I still can't deny.

While the past few days have been physically draining, due to I have no idea what reason it is, other than work. But nah, can't be much from work since I've been doing this for almost two months already.

And, don't worry, I'm still loving every bit of it at Dempsey. That's 'cause we've got nice people there, haha. =)

Oh right, I wanted to rant about how unfair it is of Lucas to deny his love for Peyton! I'm referring to One Tree Hill Season 5 by the way, and it's kind of going to be a spoiler. I mean, throughout the past few seasons of the show, it's always meant to be, the two of them. I can't believe that I had cried during the past two episodes to see Peyton's heart broken by Lucas again, sigh.

Okay, I'll go watch some Friends later to make myself happy, and then have an early night.

hundred & ninetyone

2008-02-18T00:34:00.003+08:00

itunes: the last song by the all-american rejects

I didn't think that you would change so much.

But probably it might actually be good, and help me move on. Probably it might slowly turn into dislike, or rather hate.

It actually seems to be moving towards that way. And I hope I'm not lying to myself, nor trying to prove it to anyone.

This aside, I'm kind of waiting in anticipation for the A's results. Rumours are just spreading around but no one actually knows when it is.

And besides waiting for the release of the results, and application of universities, I would just want the following to fill up the rest of the ten and a half months left in the year, and I will be more than satisfied: driving lessons + license, scooping more ice-cream, probably a month-long internship at some law firm or something, catching up with friends, spending time with family, keeping healthy, and trips to shopping + sentosa.

Probably so, then I would be a much happier girl. =)

hundred & ninety

2008-02-16T03:57:00.002+08:00

itunes: if your heart's not in it by westlife

'Cause it's never easy to overcome the feeling of missing.

I've been having too much late nights, and I really think I should start being normal.

hundred & eightynine

2008-02-12T21:13:00.000+08:00

itunes: come back down by lifehouse

I can't believe how unlucky I was at work today. I got my finger burnt by the waffle cone machine, and okay, it was just a really minor burn.

Two hours later, the bigger tray that was used to bake the two trays of brownies burnt my thigh area. And I'm wondering if it's like a first-degree burn or whatever shit it is. 'Cause it's freaking hell painful.

And Dempsey's kind of like becoming my second home already.

Anyway, A's results are supposedly coming out on Friday. Oh please.

hundred & eightyeight

2008-02-10T22:38:00.000+08:00

itunes: teardrops on my guitar by taylor swift

The past few days, spent celebrating CNY and it's been quite a fun time after all still. Eve was the usual steamboat dinner at home, followed by visiting on the First day and to Ronnie's house after that. Spent kind of large amount of energy playing hopscotch with his sister, who's almost ten years younger than me. And I was freaking tired out by it after that night.

Second day was movie with the family and popped by Joel's house after that for twentyone and inbetween. It was really funny 'cause we played in-between with the CNY goodies instead and some ended up eating almost ten slices of kuehlapis.

Then, just yesterday, for the Third day, got the class people plus the bowlers down for gathering at my place, for the usual things again. We tried in-between once again with the food, and we finished one whole tin of muruku + kueh lapis again.

I haven't been able to sleep at proper time the past few days, averaging almost 4am the past few nights/mornings. I'm going to sleep early today I think, since there's driving in the morning, and I'm actually kind of excited to get back to work.

Anyway, I just realised a while ago that it's the tenth of February again, two years ago, was the O Level results + Dad's company dinner. It's been really, really fast.

hundred & eightyseven

2008-02-06T03:49:00.000+08:00

itunes: blind by lifehouse

Oh my, it's like almost four, and I'm still up here, just done with supper and my daily dosage of Friends.

Having to take a break for almost one week from work, is going to feel kind of weird. But well, it's the CNY after all, which can get quite fun. I'm especially looking forward to Saturday, where the class+bowling people will be over at my house once again. My fave people from school.

Class dinner last Saturday night was good. It made me really miss being the "mother" of the class, treating the class people as the "kids", haha.

Anyway, I got my FIRST salary for my FIRST ever job today! =) =) =)

And to reward myself, I got a Lomo Actionsampler Flash! I really hope it'll be delivered before Val's Day, so that it will help me get ideas for that day.

Okay, I'll wake up within six hours.

hundred & eightysix

2008-01-29T20:32:00.000+08:00

itunes: over you by daughtry

I just wish that it ain't true. That I didn't guess it correctly.

Please.
Tell me that I'm wrong.

I'm slowly getting closure,
I guess it's really over.
~~I'm finally getting better.~~
And now I'm picking up these pieces.
I'm spending all of these years,
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got

over you?